Friday, November 23, 2007
MONK?
Anyone read the Monk books? I just realized there were books. So, if I watch the show will the book be the same thing?
Friday, November 02, 2007
a total waste of makeup
So Barnes and Noble were having a big sale a while back. I bought all kinds of books for $2.40 a piece. Keeping that in mind I was not too choosy in my selections. I mean for $3 if it is bad you don't feel bad for not reading it! So one of those purchases was a total waste of makeup by Kim Gruenenfelder. A little except picking up the grandparents from the airport before their granddaughter's wedding:
"Before I can ask my mother what deluded universe she lives in, we see my grandparents and Mawv coming down the escalator.
Grandama and Grandpa look like a couple of Protestants on vacation. They're dressed head-to-toe in L.L. Bean, including the shoes. If they were visiting New York, they'd have been mugged already.
My Mawv, on the other hand, is dressed in a beautiful pink dress that I swear I saw this spring at Bloomingdale's, and three-inch-high heels. A ninety-five-year-old woman in three-inch-heels.
If that sight doesn't cover the cost of admission, I don't know what does. Grandma holds Mawv's hand, treating her like an invalid who could break at any moment.
"Are you all right, Mother?!" Grandma screams into Mauv's left ear.
"Rose," Mawv responds in her normal voice, "I bought a hearing aid so that people wouldn't shout at me."
"Bernice!" Grandpa screams into her right ear, "Your hearing aid isn't working! You couldn't hear a word I said on the plane!" "NO, I was ignoring you!" Mawv (aka Bernice) mockingly screams back into Grandpa's ear. Then she returns to her normal voice. "I bought this damn thing because it said on the box that it filters out unwanted noise. But I can still hear every damn thing you say." She sees me and her face lights up. "Munchkin!"
"Before I can ask my mother what deluded universe she lives in, we see my grandparents and Mawv coming down the escalator.
Grandama and Grandpa look like a couple of Protestants on vacation. They're dressed head-to-toe in L.L. Bean, including the shoes. If they were visiting New York, they'd have been mugged already.
My Mawv, on the other hand, is dressed in a beautiful pink dress that I swear I saw this spring at Bloomingdale's, and three-inch-high heels. A ninety-five-year-old woman in three-inch-heels.
If that sight doesn't cover the cost of admission, I don't know what does. Grandma holds Mawv's hand, treating her like an invalid who could break at any moment.
"Are you all right, Mother?!" Grandma screams into Mauv's left ear.
"Rose," Mawv responds in her normal voice, "I bought a hearing aid so that people wouldn't shout at me."
"Bernice!" Grandpa screams into her right ear, "Your hearing aid isn't working! You couldn't hear a word I said on the plane!" "NO, I was ignoring you!" Mawv (aka Bernice) mockingly screams back into Grandpa's ear. Then she returns to her normal voice. "I bought this damn thing because it said on the box that it filters out unwanted noise. But I can still hear every damn thing you say." She sees me and her face lights up. "Munchkin!"
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